TODDLER
How to Expand Your Picky Eater’s Palate
Many toddlers tenaciously refuse most foods…but there are tools to expand your picky-eater’s palate.
Written by
Dr. Harvey Karp
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TODDLER
Written by
Dr. Harvey Karp
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Feeding, feeding, feeding has been your big job for a long, long time. We all feel like good parents when our kids clean their plates.
Yet, many toddlers tenaciously refuse any food other than crackers, macaroni and cheese, and buttered bread. Do not take this fussiness personally; it is just a normal part of the rigidity so common to the toddler years. Take some time to read a book or check with your doctor to learn the amount of nutrients your child really needs, and track their food intake over a week or two to see if they are getting enough. Most kids require less than we think.
Smart parents avoid battles they cannot win. So rather than trying to force your child to eat something he does not want, sidestep the conflict by hiding it in the food he likes or finding a win-win compromise.
Narrate your child’s strong desire not to eat so she knows you understand. (Here are more tips about how to connect with an upset toddler.)
Casually point out what kids have on their plates when you visit restaurants (though resist the urge to compare other kids to your own—that could make your child feel worse…and more defiant). Invite older kids to your house to eat a meal. Toddlers love imitating others, especially slightly older kids.
Compete to see who can chomp down the 'little trees' (broccoli) the fastest. Offer choices ('Should I give you three peas or two?') and suggest a win-win compromise ('Eat a green bean and you can have another French fry. Eat two more green beans and you can have all five of these French fries!'). If your toddler drives a hard bargain and eats only one tiny nibble of the bean, you should still give her a piece of the French fry because that is definitely a baby step in the right direction.
When your toddler reaches for a piece of broccoli, at first let her have only a tiny piece. Say, 'No way! Mummy wants them ALL! They’re Mummy’s trees.' When your toddler gobbles up her piece, make a silly pout and say, 'Hey, you ate my broccoli!!'
Reverse psychology in action: When 2-year-old Celia refused to eat, Mark and Karen pretended to try to sneak bits of food off her plate as though they were greedy and wanted all her food for themselves. 'We appeal to her basic sense of "It’s mine!"' says Mark. 'It works about half the time, but a 50-50 success rate ain’t so bad.'
Lips still zipped? If your child still will not eat, let her leave the table. However, if she returns for a little milk or sweets, you might put her 'on hold' by doing something like this: Begin to hand her the milk, then suddenly stop and offer her a smidge of dinner first. 'You want milky? Okay, sweetheart, here is your milk. Oops, silly Mummy! Mummy forgot, big girls have to eat one green bean before milky! Do you want to eat this big one or this little teeny, tiny, baby bean?'
If she refuses, say, 'No problem, my love. But no beans . . . no milky.' Then say, 'I will check on you in just a second to see if you are ready for your bean.' Now turn and busy yourself with something for 30 seconds. Then turn back and whisper, 'I know you do not like beans sooooooo much. So should we find a teeny, tiny one or would you rather just eat a half of one?' As soon as she eats her bean, reward her with a smile, milk, and a little time-in. This will encourage faster cooperation in the future.
Okay, the following may sound like you are being a spy more than an ambassador, but here are my favourite tricks for getting nutrients and veggies past your toddler’s lips:
Disclaimer: The information on our site is NOT medical advice for any specific person or condition. It is only meant as general information. If you have any medical questions and concerns about your child or yourself, please contact your health provider. Breastmilk is the best source of nutrition for babies. It is important that, in preparation for and during breastfeeding, mothers eat a healthy, balanced diet. Combined breast- and bottle-feeding in the first weeks of life may reduce the supply of a mother's breastmilk and reversing the decision not to breastfeed is difficult. If you do decide to use infant formula, you should follow instructions carefully.
